The Lord is my helper

I changed my password today. No I’m not telling you what it is. But I’ll tell you what it was.

Two years ago I was in the position to mandate a new password policy at work. So we switched to pass phrases, and everyone hated me. I’m sure that a number of the passwords were things like “I hate IT.” or maybe “I hate IT!” to get that special punctuation mark in there.

At that time, I had an office with a large window, and on it I wrote the Scripture passage that I was clinging to:

Keep your life free from love of money, and be content with what you have, for he has said, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.” So we can confidently say,

“The Lord is my helper;
I will not fear;
what can man do to me?”

(Hebrews 13:5-6)

The world was beginning to come apart. I had just completed a difficult and traumatic relocation project at work. I had just begun an audit of our IT resources that would lead to some of the largest expenditures in the history of the organization. My family was on the verge of leaving our church.

And every day, when I went into work, I typed the same phrase:

“The Lord is my helper.”

There’s not enough money.

“The Lord is my helper.”

Senior management isn’t getting it.

“The Lord is my helper.”

There aren’t enough people.

“The Lord is my helper.”

I’m going to be excommunicated.

“The Lord is my helper.”

Does my wife still love me?

“The Lord is my helper.”

Will my family survive?

“The Lord is my helper.”

I’ve been abandoned.

“The Lord is my helper.”

I’m so alone.

“The Lord is my helper.”

Every day, I typed this phrase, hoping that it would help me remember, hoping that it was true, hoping that, somehow, it would all work out. Hoping that I wouldn’t go down forever.

And you know what?

It’s been true. I’ve spent many days over the last couple of years trapped in anger and fear, but the Lord was indeed my helper.

And now, I’ve changed my password. Because it’s time to move past this dark stretch in my life. Because it’s time to look to the future. It’s time to embrace hope and forgiveness and redemption.

I’ll bet you’re wondering what my new password is. But I can’t tell you. The folks in IT would kill me.

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